What IF I gave up then?
Three years ago, I discovered my strengths along with my true purpose in life. To concisely summarize, I am here to help other leaders become the best version of who they already are. During my leadership transformation, I fell in love with the process to the point that I became determined to help other leaders experience my evolution and discover for themselves how to be a more effective leader.
I was so inspired that I took it upon myself to create a leadership program for some of the most talented leaders in the organization I was a part of during that time period. My objective was to help in their growth and development through the practice of what I had just learned.
I ordered twelve copies of John Maxwell’s best-selling leadership book, The 21 Laws to use as a resource for our mastermind discussions. I got to work one Sunday afternoon writing a curriculum to use as a guide in the launch of this program and to help successfully frame this exciting and life-changing opportunity I had pulled together.
It was the FIRST time I had done something like this workshop. As a result, I was nervous but EXCITED!
It didn’t even register with me that I had committed six hours of my Sunday to work on this project. I loved the subject so much and felt so engaged through immersing myself in the materials.
On January 11th, 2017 the program began with weekly group calls to discuss a chapter in the book and share our different impressions of how we viewed that area of leadership within ourselves. The program was a 13-week exercise focused on looking within ourselves and where we were at within our own leadership abilities. Mid-way through the program I introduced StrengthsFinders to help each leader understand where their natural talents and how to use them best in the job they were paid to do.
I will never forget the feeling of elation that I experienced each week just prior to our 90-minute call to discuss the leadership topic of the week. It had been years since I felt this excited to go to work! It was clear that was in my element.
I began juggling my normal job duties of my role during the day and making time to write out a leadership lesson for the next call either late at night after my kids went to bed or on the weekends to be prepared for the following week.
The thirteen weeks flew by and we learned so much about each other and how we all shared similar challenges. I knew that I was building something that would help others.
And then, the feedback came in…
The infamous comment which still occasionally swirls around in my head, “It would be great to have someone who has real leadership experience teach this course” was how I recall the comment. It continued, “I didn’t learn anything that I didn’t already know. I didn’t find this course helpful in my leadership development” were a few more of the comments. It hit me like a brick. I had worked so hard to help and learn in this process but I felt like I failed due to a single person's comments. That was my chance to show what I could do and if I didn’t succeed here I may never see it again.
There is so much that I have learned looking back at this moment in my life. The negative feedback I had received became my fuel. The more I read it, the more I knew I had to work on becoming better and gain more experience coaching and facilitating. I also had to learn that if I wanted to really do this I would have to possess the ability to get back up, dust myself off, swallow my pride, put my head down and get back to work.
My mentor shared with me that he has been teaching leadership for 40 years and conceded that his first speech he was HORRIBLE. In his words, “you are never good the first time Kelly, so take a deep breath, accept their feedback, and keep working at it.”
If I had given up back then, where would I be now? Perhaps where I was then, doing the exact same thing I was doing.
So many people try to grow but when they hit a rough spot or fail they don’t continue the path but instead retreat to the safety of where they were. We fall into the trap of not realizing how hard it would be so we think we can’t go any further or it won’t happen fast enough. Our confidence slips and we start to think we aren’t good enough. That’s what I thought.
So I say this to all of you out there in this moment, consider the following:
What IF I stopped and let that moment control my future and what I wanted to do?
What IF I said it’s too hard?
What IF I gave up then?
Last week, I was hired by one of the largest healthcare systems in Delaware to help train and develop 150 of their leaders through my own leadership development organization I launched not long ago.
They were referred to me by another hospital system that shared how I made a huge impact on the development of their leaders.
I wasn’t an overnight success and it was very hard at times. But I was following my passion and what I have developed was the blueprint to help other leaders become the best version of who they already are… exactly what I had set out to do!
IF I had given up, I wouldn’t be where I am today.
To your growth,
Kelly